In the last few weeks I have been thinking and talking a lot about family and marriage. I have been married for nearly 5 years and we have 2 little ones so it is very easy to let life take over and not put each other first. To be honest after a crazy, irritating and draining day home with our 2 boys I don’t want to think about anyone or anything else but myself. But lately I have been realizing that when you give to your spouse they are more willing to give to you.
I have just been thinking about how I don’t want to be married for 40+ years and just have so a so-so marriage. I want to have a marriage full of love, passion, friendship and shared interests. So the million dollar question is how do you have an amazing marriage and keep it hot even when life gets a little tough and the kids don’t make things any easier?
I am no expert in the field of marriage but I am a woman who is married so I think that gives me some insight. So here are a few things that I have been pondering lately and why I believe they are so important.
- Have some FUN! When I think back on some memorable times with my husband in the last year I have to say they are dates that didn’t include dinner and a movie. We tried new things. We went horseback riding or went to a park that allowed us to laugh our asses off while riding on bumper cars and playing miniature golf. We were able to really enjoy each others company and laugh.
- Take some time away from real life for more than 2 days. Whether or not you have kids you have to get away from day-to-day life. It allows you to reconnect and HAVE FUN! Whenever my husband and I get away (which isn’t that often) it helps remind us why we fell in love and first decided to start this journey together.
- Find a way to make your partner feel special and important to you. Who doesn’t want to feel special? Enough said.
- Engage in your spouses interest and hobbies. My poor husband he LOVES to shoot his guns. He is always bothering me to go shoot with him and I never do. It’s one of those things that I need to do whether or not it interests me because I know it means something to him. For God’s sake my husband just wants to do something with me, why have I not made it a priority? It’s a perfect example me not putting my spouse first.
- Kiss. Don’t just kiss because it’s leading you to the bedroom. Kiss because its passionate and can send chills down your spine and put those butterflies back in your stomach. And because it’s a good way of showing someone that they are special and wanted.
- Allow each other to be themselves and not just “the other half”. I think it’s very important to have a life outside of your spouse. My husband encourages me to have girls nights and I want him to go golfing with his buddies. We don’t need to be together 24/7. We are happier when we get a little time outside the family.
This list could go on and on but I just wanted to write about a few things that have been racing through my head the last week or so about marriage.
If you were to give one piece advice on marriage what would it be?